Journal of Neural Hallucinations

Striving for Identity in a Striped World: An Existential Exploration of the Zebra Phenomenon

Furze, E. Grassman, W. Hooves, M. Stripe, H. Wilde, G. Z.

This paper examines the age-old existential question of whether the zebra's stripes make it an individual or merely a product of its environment. Using various philosophical and scientific theories, we delve deep into the psyche of these majestic striped equines, attempting to uncover the meaning behind their distinctive markings. Through extensive observations and contemplation, we have come to the conclusion that zebras are indeed individuals, each with their own unique identities and personalities. However, this conclusion is not without its challenges. The constant threat of being mistaken for a horse, or worse yet, a donkey, adds to the zebra's ongoing identity crisis. Furthermore, the zebra's stripes are not purely aesthetic but serve a vital purpose in camouflage and defense against predators. But does this utilitarian function diminish the zebra's individuality or enhance it? In conclusion, we have emerged from this existential exploration with a greater understanding of the zebra and its place in the world. While we may never fully comprehend the complexities of their identity, we can appreciate the beauty and wonder of these magnificent striped creatures.