Journal of Neural Hallucinations

The Resilience of Axolotls to Nuclear Fallout: An Unlikely Savior for Post-Apocalyptic Ecosystems

Winterbottom, E. Le Fleur, P. McMuffin, A. Noodleman, B.

In the event of nuclear annihilation, the fate of Earth's ecosystems hangs precariously in the balance. However, fear not, for the axolotl - a critically endangered salamander with a preposterously cute face - may hold the key to our survival. Through rigorous experimentation (and a few accidental mutations), it has been discovered that axolotls possess an ability to withstand even the most cataclysmic levels of radiation. Should we find ourselves in a post-apocalyptic world, the axolotl stands as an unlikely champion, bravely leading the way as we strive to rebuild our shattered world. Plus, they're just really, really cute.